How Positive Self-Talk Reduces Stress

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About the Show
On this episode, Chuck Gaidica is joined by Dr. Kristyn Gregory, Medical Director of Behavioral Health for Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan. Together, they discuss ways positive self-talk can be beneficial to stress reduction.
In this episode of A Healthier Michigan Podcast, we explore:
  • The physical and mental connection between positive-self talk and stress reduction
  • Practical techniques to incorporate positive self-talk into their daily routines
  • Common challenges people face when adopting positive self-talk
  • The effect of the long-term practice of self-positive on overall mental health

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Transcript
Chuck Gaidica:
The average person has 12 to 60,000 thoughts a day, and you might be surprised at what percentage of those thoughts on, average, are negative. This is A Healthier Michigan Podcast, episode 152. And coming up, we discuss the impact positive self-talk can have on our overall wellbeing.
Welcome to A Healthier Michigan Podcast. It's a podcast that's dedicated to navigating how we can all improve our health and wellbeing through small, healthy habits we can start implementing right now. I'm your host, Chuck Gaidica, and every other week we sit down with a certified expert and we discuss topics that cover nutrition, fitness, and a lot more. And on this episode, we're going in deep into positive self-talk and how it can reduce stress and improve resilience. With me today is Medical Director of Behavioral Health for Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan, Dr. Kristen Gregory. Good to see you again, Doctor.

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Good to see you again, Chuck.

Chuck Gaidica:
You've got such a myriad of experience. I know that you've worked with children and adults, starting in Chicago and then moving to Detroit, and practicing at Wayne State. So this is an interesting topic because we've had a previous episode that's dealt with some of this information. So it may sound interesting, but this is going to go into what a lot of us really deal with. For some of us, it's a passing thing. But according to the National Science Foundation, that's where we get these numbers, on average, a person has 12 to 60,000 thoughts a day. They're not all negative, but that's how many there are. See, I thought I had an empty head, but I've got it filled with something.
And of those, 80% are negative, according to the National Science Foundation. So on this previous episode I mentioned, we discussed what's called negativity bias and how negative thoughts can often carry more weight in our minds than positive ones. And too often this pattern of self-talk that we develop is negative, due in large part to experiences and things that we've had happen to us throughout our lives. So frequent negative self-talk may lead to, we're told, decreased motivation, greater feelings of helplessness. So one of the questions is, Doctor, is it possible to combat negative thoughts by changing our outlook to something more positive?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
It definitely is. You can switch the negative to a positive. I'm guilty, obviously, of the 80% negative thoughts. You can switch the gears. For example, instead of saying, "I can't finish this before the deadline," or "I can't get my computer to work to do this podcast," you might say something like, "I'll do my best to finish on time, but I can only do the best I can." Or, "I've figured out how to work Zencastr before, and I can again."

Chuck Gaidica:
That's how we communicate with each other. But you're here. I'm here. So it's working great. See, there's the positive, right? So let's talk about this idea of, we've heard about this our whole lives, PMA, positive mental attitude. So we can seriously just shift that? Because there are phrases, one that I use on occasion, I really don't live in a negative world, but you'll hear people, or I'll exclaim, "Oh, there it goes again." Or you get two things that happen in a row, and all of a sudden you think it's your whole day is going to be filled with problems. Not really the case, right?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Yeah, exactly.

Chuck Gaidica:
So can we navigate this space in a positive way? And one of the questions is going to be, not just talking about positive attitude, but what is the physical and mental connection between that positive self-talk and reducing stress? How does that play out?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
So researchers are trying to continue to explore the effects of this positive thinking on optimism. But health benefits so far that we think positive thinking might provide include longer lifespan, decreased depression, decreased levels of distress and pain, greater resistance to illness overall, and that's by the stress-reducing properties, greater resistance to cancer, respiratory infections, better coping skills during hardship and times of stress, which we all could use.

Chuck Gaidica:
And I remember growing up, my mom and dad used to tell me, and I still tell our kids, "Hang around with positive people because it will rub off." And I suspect there's a lot to that, right? If all you do is hang out either online, or peruse stuff online or in person with negative Nellies, it's a fait accompli, isn't it? That you're going to walk around maybe sometimes a little bit more glum than is reality? Am I off?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
No. There's two parts to that, though, too. And so what your inner dialogue is occurring, what you're saying to yourself as you're perusing through this, can also affect it. So if you see something negative and you're like, "Oh, my life's like that too," as opposed to looking at the positive and saying, "I have my health, I have a sense of competence," whatever it might be, to combat that negative. But habits take at least 21 days to occur and begin to get cemented in. So it's something that requires practice and commitment. And you might say to yourself, "I can do that. I can change my negative thoughts to positive thoughts."

Chuck Gaidica:
So that's one practical technique. What are others? What are other strategies that we can employ to incorporate this positive self-talk into our daily routine? So of that 80%, we get it to a tipping point where it's a lot less than that, and we start walking around with a bit of a positive swagger instead, what else can we do?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
We can start by listening to our inner monologue and noticing, is it mostly positive or is it mostly negative? And questioning ourselves, what would your close friends or coworkers or significant other, would they talk to you in this way? Would they say negative things or positive things? And to focus on what thoughts seem to be recurring. And then think about that theme and why these thoughts might be coming up, as well as why these negative thoughts might be stopping you from achieving your goals.

Chuck Gaidica:
And I suspect that if you... There's so many things that cross my mind that could be connected to this, that I guess you could even consider therapeutic in a way. Gratefulness. You're saying be grateful for the positive things that you have in your life. And I think for me, when I concentrate on those, it's hard for that other stuff to creep in.

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Yeah, exactly. So if the task is simple, you keep the self-talk simple. Just tell yourself you can do it.

Chuck Gaidica:
A lot of people face more than just this passing notion of a negative thought. There are challenges that people face when they're attempting to adopt this positive self-talk. What other challenges can you see, and how can they be navigated from a mental health standpoint, if this is a recurring theme for you? You're trying to do some self-awareness evaluation, and to be honest, some of us are not good at self-evaluating. We meet people that they don't have a filter or they don't understand themselves. But if you can't get past that, what are some of the other challenges that you should be watching out for that can start to be little red flags in your life?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Being able to reframe it, and reframe the way we look at stressful situations or difficulties, and how we can approach them. And so going from "this is too difficult" to "I can do this," it seems like it should be a one step process, but it's not necessarily. So if it's a new or complex task, you can talk yourself through it. And I think that one of the struggles with that is we feel kind of silly. We don't want people to think that we're talking to ourselves. But you can say, "I'm going to do this now," and start doing it actively. And so there was a recent study that...
And even if you look at the Super Bowl, so NFL players will do that. They'll use self-talk on the field and do it deliberately. And it's like giving yourself a pep talk while you're warming up or on the bench or about to start a new half. You can talk to yourself in third person, for better emotional regulation, too, which feels silly, but you'd be like, "Hey, Kristyn, it's okay. You've got this," as compared to "I've got this." And then it activates areas in your brain that are involved in self-control in a different fashion, and it can make it easier to regulate your emotions.

Chuck Gaidica:
So wait a minute, speaking to, "Hey Chuck, everything's going to be okay today." Speaking in the third person is actually more therapeutic than just having positive thoughts. That's what you're saying?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Yeah. It's an illusion that you're talking to somebody else. So the advice that you would give your friend, you're actually giving your friend, but you should be friends with yourself first and foremost. And so doing that trick can really help.

Chuck Gaidica:
And should that be spoken out loud? That's not just something internal in your mind, you're saying to literally speak it.

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Right. Obviously you have to be in the correct place, but yeah, even if it's quietly to yourself, or you could jot down notes. You could text yourself, "Hey, I know that today's a hard day, but I know that you can do this. You have this, you've done it before."

Chuck Gaidica:
That's interesting. While there are all kinds of things we've talked about smartphones in previous episodes, good news, bad news with how much we're online, etc on a phone, one of the great things about a phone and connectivity in a car is you can talk out loud to yourself and it no longer looks strange, because nobody knows. Nobody knows if you're singing, if you're talking to yourself, or you're connected to your spouse or your buddy, nobody knows anymore. So you can do that. There's a good place to do it, I guess.

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Yeah, exactly. And if you think about a person in your life that is particularly supportive, maybe it's the person that knows that you have a big project due and they text you some words of advice or affirmations. There's no reason why you can't give that to yourself. So the support that your supportive friends and relationships give you, what's wrong with giving that to yourself and really changing those negative thoughts to positive ones.

Chuck Gaidica:
As an adjunct to that, does it help, like the game show that repeats a million times a day, for us to phone a friend? Does that help that we really have a positive influence in our life that we know will be there, not just for advice, but whether it's viewed as a pep talk or not overtly, that it's somebody who literally can help us through that moment and give us the attaboy? Does that help?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Yeah, definitely. You would want to reach out to somebody like that as opposed to somebody in your life who's a negative Nelly and is going to be saying, "Oh yeah, I can see why you're anxious," because that just keys you up even more.

Chuck Gaidica:
Right. I had a family member in my life who suffered from rumination, this constant playing of a record that was negative. It gets you stuck in the past in many ways. At least I saw it. I don't know if that's always the case. Maybe rumination can be what happened during your mourning, but this was something from the past. When you feel, if you're self-aware enough to realize that this is a record that's playing again, where do we get to a point where that mental health challenge is not necessarily a self-fixing thing? How do we recognize that?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
We recognize that if we have symptoms that are significantly affecting our life and our well-being, such as if you have depression, it would be for a two-week period feeling down, feeling like you can't do anything, you don't want to do anything, as well as physical changes in your appetite, sleep, levels of irritability, thoughts that life isn't worth living, now those are emergency signs that you need to get some professional help.

Chuck Gaidica:
So if we start to practice this idea of positive self-talk and how it contributes to our overall mental health, I mentioned as we got into the intro, this idea of resilience. We hear that word even used in the corporate setting. It's something that employers even test prospective employees for. They want to know, are they resilient? Can they handle the stuff that's thrown at them and not just cave in? What's that relationship of positive self-talk and the idea of resilience in our ability to cope with stressors in our life?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
I think it gives you a sense that the coping skills that you have, work, so that you are able. You know I am able to get through this. I know that I can do this. And so that almost serves like a muscle memory type situation where, in stressful situations or situations of adversity, you have the muscle memory, which in this case would be those coping skills, to successfully navigate through the situation, because you know that you do, you've done it before. You've told yourself that you are fully capable of doing that and navigating through these trials and tribulations as well.

Chuck Gaidica:
So you've given us a lot of great stuff, and I'm encouraged, I've heard this before. We've probably in the past had an episode that we've talked about this idea of anything you practice... Sure, to me, with piano lessons as an adult, it took way more than 21 weeks, and then it still didn't work out. But if you practice...

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Well see, you can reframe it that you practiced and you tried to the best of your ability to learn piano, and maybe you learned to read music in the meantime or gained a greater appreciation for musical talent overall.

Chuck Gaidica:
I love the way you frame that, Doctor. I love it. At the end of six months, and I'll wrap my part up, When the Saints Come Marching In is all I could play. And I thought, I learned how to fly an airplane. I can learn how to do things. It's a challenge. But anyway, I was...

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Can play one song. You can play one song.

Chuck Gaidica:
One song. There's a positive spin. There it is. So 21 days, that encourages me that we can, whether it's your lifestyle, diet, whether it's positive thoughts, 21 days, just put it in the bank and say, "I'm going to keep on going for three weeks and see if this thing sticks," right?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Yep. Exactly.

Chuck Gaidica:
Well, what other takeaways can you give us as we wrap it up here?

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Just that this is a common challenge. If they're doing surveys and 80% of the thoughts are negative, if you have negative thoughts, you are definitely not alone. So I think that this is something that everybody can get benefit from, and we all need to work on so we can better navigate stress and issues, and not let those negative thoughts and negative bias carry more weight in our minds than the positive ones.

Chuck Gaidica:
Well, it's good to see you again.

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
You too.

Chuck Gaidica:
Thanks for the advice. And I'm going to walk around today whistling, well, the same tune, but 21 days of positive thought. I can play one song, so there you go.

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Yep. And maybe you'll whistle that. Yeah, that'll be the tune that you whistle when you say that you can do stuff. You'll be whistling When the Saints Come Marching In.

Chuck Gaidica:
It'll just be stuck in my head forever, now, yeah. Well, Dr. Gregory, nice of you to be with us again today. Take good care.

Dr. Kristyn Gregory:
Thank you. You too.

Chuck Gaidica:
Dr. Kristyn Gregory is Medical Director of Behavioral Health for Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan. And we thank you for being with us. Thanks for listening to A Healthier Michigan Podcast. It's brought to you by Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan. If you like the show, you want to know more, we've got 151 other episodes you can check out. You can go to our newly refreshed website, ahealthiermichigan.org/podcast. You can leave us reviews or ratings on Apple Podcast or Spotify. You can follow us on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter. We've got a YouTube channel so you can get all the new episodes, old episodes on your smartphone or tablet. And be sure to subscribe to us on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or your favorite podcast app. I'm Chuck Gaidica. Be well.

A Healthier Michigan is sponsored by Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan, a nonprofit, independent licensee of the Blue Cross Blue Shield Association.
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